I recently lost my job, which is never a good thing in general, and even more so when you have one kid in college and the other one finishing high school. I have always believed that everything happens for a reason, but it’s at these moments when that belief is challenged.
So here I sit trying to understand the reason, but better yet, trying to be open to what might be coming.
Ever since I stepped out of my comfort zone to have children and gotten said children into school, I have found myself reinventing what I do about every 5 years. I call it being “creative”, but it might more aptly be named “I’m bored now what?”. I went from doing medical research, to working in an urgent care, to getting certified as a personal trainer, to starting my own personal training business (how hard can it be? Found out, hard), to managing a gym (side note: no managerial experience, but believing I can do it), to a lead coach in a boot camp franchise, to unemployment. I find boredom to be a very good motivator, but if I’m being completely honest here and that’s exactly what this is all about, it was never so much about boredom, though, that is what I told myself. It was about that niggling feeling that I’m not in the right place anymore. It always felt like it was a step on a path to something bigger, something more.
If I think back in my life when there was a shift, usually it occurred after someone new intersected the path I was on. Someone who said the word that woke me up, said the word that made me take a beat and look at things differently. Each time, I knew this person was put into my life for a reason.
So here I am facing the next step in my life and having no clue what that step might entail. In the past, I usually had some sort of idea what I would do next, be that someone saying, “hey you’d be good at X” or myself saying “I’ve always liked Z” or as simple as “that might be fun”. Right now, I really do not have any big ideas other than a tinge of panic due to a loss of income and remember those college kids, did I say panic? What I am trying to do is fall back on my old system: everything does happen for a reason. I just need to be a bit more patient to know which way to go. I’m trying to be reflective as to how I got here. The simple fact that I sit here writing these words, did I mention I never thought of myself as a writer, is due to an amazing friend who crossed my path because I ventured into my last job. She sees something in me that I do not, but I’m trying to look through her eyes to find a clue to my next step. Sometimes it is those people who enter our lives dangling the key to the door that will open once the window slams shut. She is teaching me to be open to anything and everything, pay attention to your surroundings (kinda like I tell my kids when they go out). I am trying to heed her advice to patiently listen and watch. It’s not easy for someone who has trouble sitting still.
If I think back in my life when there was a shift, usually it occurred after someone new intersected the path I was on. Someone who said the word that woke me up, said the word that made me take a beat and look at things differently. Each time, I knew this person was put into my life for a reason. OK, maybe not immediately, because in the short term they are a pain in the ass trying to get you out of your box, but eventually! Today I am quietly paying attention and feeling thankful for this new friend who said the word that woke me up and remembering there are no coincidences.